How to find the right person for you

Wednesday 08 December 2021 - 13:01:14

On-line dating

I just saw two movies about a writer sharing her experiences with on-line dating, so I decided to do the same thing.
For a few years I have had a business helping people improve their lives. Part of it was life coaching and part was matchmaking for single people. Not only did I help people to find someone on-line, but I also did a couple of a live singles events in Richmond.
Part of my recruiting for single people was meeting them in person and talking to them about their dating experiences. I learned so many things about what they were looking for, who they met, how their dates went.
I also have experiences of my own by being on dating websites and meeting single guys. I learned that there are so many people who wish to meet someone. The opportunity is so slim, especially now with the limitation of open places and people being afraid to socialize with others. It is very challenging to meet single people with our busy lives. So, the big question remains “How can a person who does not like going to bars to pick up someone can actually find the right partner?” On-line dating is easy and there is an opportunity to meet “the one”.
I am a very positive person, and always believe in possibilities. I don’t give up and go after what I hope for. So, I do believe there is someone for everyone. We just have to keep trying and open our options to find the one. The problem is how many people have the time and desire to go on many dates and keep trying? I do admit that it can be a very long process. I can share some thoughts and experiences with you and I hope it may make it easier and faster to find the person for you.
1. Create your profile
I try to put a few pictures that show different sides of me. Photos are the first thing that catch someone's eyes, so they really need to be chosen carefully and show who you are. Not only should you put some head shots and full body shots, but also show yourself in different perspectives. If you like elegant outfits, put some pics in them. If you like sports pick one of you doing some sport activities. By the photos, the person looking at them can see what you like to do and who you are. I don’t put any photos of me and kids, friends, or previous boyfriends. If you put pics of friends for some people it is hard to figure out which one of them is you. I personally don’t want to see pictures of guys next to their previous spouses. I also recommend picking more current pictures. Many people have told me that they started talking to someone and they were so excited to meet them and when they did the person looked completely different (and not for the better)! Why waste your and their time. Guys will like you the way you are. Each of them has a different opinion about beauty. They are looking for different body types, styles, and personalities. Don’t try to be someone else - you can’t pretend for a very long time so at the end you will be who you are anyway, so why not from the beginning. If they do not like you the way you are, move on for they are not worth your time.

Next time I will talk about how to meet who you are looking for on a website and how to start conversation with them, and what to do before going on a date.

[Submitted by Monika Trevilian]